Today we are looking at how to “wait” for your husband.
Waiting is not the easiest thing in the world. I know this because I have waited for things before and I’m still waiting for things. That feeling of anticipation without knowing when your expectations will be met just doesn’t sit down well with me. It didn’t sit down well with Abraham and Sarah either. We are already old and wrinkled. When will the child come, they must have thought.
But waiting is a part of life. At some point in our lives, we have to wait for something. We may have to wait for that job. We may have to wait for a pregnancy to happen. We may have to wait for a life partner. Though this article is focused on waiting for a husband, I think we can all take something away from here.
I read a quote that says, “waiting is hard when all you do is wait”. True words. If your main life goal is to sit and wait for a man to marry you, then you won’t even be able to live and enjoy your life properly. AND you are most likely to attract the wrong person when filled with anxiety in the waiting room. The Bible says to he that is hungry, everything bitter is sweet. (Proverbs 27:7)
Without further ado, here is how to wait:
1. You have to be full of Christ.
Be so full of Him, so lost in serving Him, utterly spending time with Him every single day that for a man to find you, he must be lost in Christ too. Practically, this means opening your Bible each day to study, praying fervently and keeping a prayer journal. It also means serving at your local church. And most importantly, it means not doing these things because you want a man to notice you and marry you but doing them because you genuinely love God and want Him more than anything else in your life. This is the best foundation you can lay for your life.
2. Be a queen, ruling in your own queendom and then your king will find you.
What this means is that you must own your life and be responsible. Live your life rather than wait for a man to come so you live it together. You know why? Because you are complete in Christ. And He has a plan for your life. Engage in doing the things that matter to you. Be busy just like Ruth was busy in the fields, getting some food. She could easily choose to be a couch potato but she chose to go out there and work. I love that woman! And you should really read her story in the book of Ruth in the Bible if you haven’t done so already. It is a great read!
3. WORK ON YOUR CHARACTER
This point is so important and I pray it speaks to the people that really need it. I have seen this over and over again. You see a lady who REALLY wants to be married. But she has a character that stinks. Like REALLY stinks. In most cases, she is beautiful outwardly and possesses admirable skills. But she despises people, misuses her tongue and is just a displeasure to be around. I know this because I have been around one too many of such ladies and I usually don’t want to stay around them. Ironically, such ladies are always blaming the people in their lives but don’t see themselves as the problem. If A has a problem with B, C and D then A is probably the problem.
These ladies will attract men but they won’t keep them. The men take off as soon as they smell the character or as soon as observers hint them about it. Here is the thing: character can never be hidden. In the book of Ruth, we see that everybody around knew Ruth as a good woman and that’s the report Boaz heard and was attracted to her. People knew her story. You might not always think about this but people know your story. And the men that come around you get to hear your story from others. That determines whether they stay or they go. What kind of report do others have about you? Your beauty on the inside is far more important than that on the inside.
One bonus point:
Pray for everything as the Bible says, including your yet-to-be marriage. While I was single, I prayed for my family every Friday. I tagged my prayers based on the starting letter of the day of the week so F in Friday for “family”. I prayed that God will give me a man after His heart. I prayed that we will serve Him together. I kept praying and I wrote down specific qualities I wanted in my to-be husband. It worked! Though I didn’t immediately see Mr N as one who fitted my desires, I eventually saw that he was God’s answer to my prayers. Sometimes, God’s answer comes in a package we do not expect. And I had this assurance that God will never ever give me a bad man because I was faithful to Him and I knew He loved me just as He still does.
You now see why I wrote wait as “wait”? Because waiting should never be just waiting. It should be living fully while trusting God for the best.
And finally sisters, let’s remind ourselves that God lets us wait to either teach us to trust Him, or because we are not ready for what He has in store for us or because the time is just not right. He makes everything beautiful in its time. Remember that faster isn’t always better.