Here comes part three of our series for the single sisters. Thank you all so much for your feedback on part 1 and part 2!
Today we are looking at how to "wait" for your husband.
Waiting is not the easiest thing in the world. I know this because I have waited for things before and I'm still waiting for things. That feeling of anticipation without knowing when your expectations will be met just doesn't sit down well with me. It didn't sit down well with Abraham and Sarah either. We are already old and wrinkled. When will the child come, they must have thought.
But waiting is a part of life. At some point in our lives, we have to wait for something. We may have to wait for that job. We may have to wait for a pregnancy to happen. We may have to wait for a life partner. Though this article is focused on waiting for a husband, I think we can all take something away from here.
I read a quote that says, "waiting is hard when all you do is wait". True words. If your main life goal is to sit and wait for a man to marry you, then you won't even be able to live and enjoy your life properly. AND you are most likely to attract the wrong person when filled with anxiety in the waiting room. The Bible says to he that is hungry, everything bitter is sweet. (Proverbs 27:7)
Without further ado, here is how to wait:
1. You have to be full of Christ.
Be so full of Him, so lost in serving Him, utterly spending time with Him every single day that for a man to find you, he must be lost in Christ too. Practically, this means opening your Bible each day to study, praying fervently and keeping a prayer journal. It also means serving at your local church. And most importantly, it means not doing these things because you want a man to notice you and marry you but doing them because you genuinely love God and want Him more than anything else in your life. This is the best foundation you can lay for your life.
2. Be a queen, ruling in your own queendom and then your king will find you.
What this means is that you must own your life and be responsible. Live your life rather than wait for a man to come so you live it together. You know why? Because you are complete in Christ. And He has a plan for your life. Engage in doing the things that matter to you. Be busy just like Ruth was busy in the fields, getting some food. She could easily choose to be a couch potato but she chose to go out there and work. I love that woman! And you should really read her story in the book of Ruth in the Bible if you haven't done so already. It is a great read!
3. WORK ON YOUR CHARACTER
This point is so important and I pray it speaks to the people that really need it. I have seen this over and over again. You see a lady who REALLY wants to be married. But she has a character that stinks. Like REALLY stinks. In most cases, she is beautiful outwardly and possesses admirable skills. But she despises people, misuses her tongue and is just a displeasure to be around. I know this because I have been around one too many of such ladies and I usually don't want to stay around them. Ironically, such ladies are always blaming the people in their lives but don't see themselves as the problem. If A has a problem with B, C and D then A is probably the problem.
These ladies will attract men but they won't keep them. The men take off as soon as they smell the character or as soon as observers hint them about it. Here is the thing: character can never be hidden. In the book of Ruth, we see that everybody around knew Ruth as a good woman and that's the report Boaz heard and was attracted to her. People knew her story. You might not always think about this but people know your story. And the men that come around you get to hear your story from others. That determines whether they stay or they go. What kind of report do others have about you? Your beauty on the inside is far more important than that on the inside.
One bonus point:
Pray for everything as the Bible says, including your yet-to-be marriage. While I was single, I prayed for my family every Friday. I tagged my prayers based on the starting letter of the day of the week so F in Friday for "family". I prayed that God will give me a man after His heart. I prayed that we will serve Him together. I kept praying and I wrote down specific qualities I wanted in my to-be husband. It worked! Though I didn't immediately see Mr N as one who fitted my desires, I eventually saw that he was God's answer to my prayers. Sometimes, God's answer comes in a package we do not expect. And I had this assurance that God will never ever give me a bad man because I was faithful to Him and I knew He loved me just as He still does.
You now see why I wrote wait as "wait"? Because waiting should never be just waiting. It should be living fully while trusting God for the best.
And finally sisters, let's remind ourselves that God lets us wait to either teach us to trust Him, or because we are not ready for what He has in store for us or because the time is just not right. He makes everything beautiful in its time. Remember that faster isn't always better.
Next Tuesday, we will look at things to remind yourself of while you are still single. Hope to see you then. God bless.
trendwithgloria.com says
Very useful tips here. I will say with all humility that, praying for your marriage in advance is the best any single can do for herself. It helped me not to miss it.
trendwithgloria.com
Precious says
So true, Gloria!
Thanks for adding your voice to this.
Lizette Tarke says
This is absolutely inspiring Meshi. I so love point 1. It really is important given Christ is indeed our true personality. It really is the foundation from which every other thing stems.
Precious says
So true, sis. When we have that firm foundation of Christ then we can build our lives the right way.
Thanks for dropping a comment!
Ngumabi says
I love them' tips my dear! There is no reason for a woman to just sit around waiting for a man to come marry her like that's why she was born in the first place. There is life to live and things to do that will also put you out there as someone's ideal partner. Cheers and nice post - Precious!
Precious says
Hi sis, there are things we can't totally control like when a woman will get married. So it will be a waste of valuable time for a woman to just sit around waiting to get married. There's so much to accomplish with or without marriage. Thanks for stopping by, dear.
brenda says
Pray for your family everyday... Nice tip. Love that part. Truth is, anything you pray for in advance is like investing for the future and it must come to pass..
Thanks Precious, my leader brother's namesake.
Brendascouch.com
Precious says
Amen.
glogeworld says
Wow! very inspiring. Thank you so much woman of God for sharing this. God bless yo and your family
Precious says
Thanks sis. God bless you too.
Seraph says
Wow! I can relate...having wait 5 years for a partner. Its not an easy thing when you decided to beat against the winds, tackle all odds and stay true to your spiritual conviction. There will always be the trying time when people will mock you in various degrees, you will even doubt your resolves and conviction at some point. For me, something kept me going, the confidence that GOD CAN NEVER BE STRANDED, AND HE IS NOT GONNA START WITH ME. Just 5 months now into my relationship, Its been good and I believe in my heart that the Gift of God is without repentance. Good work dear sister....Its a classic one
Precious says
Thank you for sharing your story! It is amazing what He can do when we wait on Him. Waiting on Him is not always the easiest thing to do but it is the best. May God continue to strengthen your relationship.
Rose says
You challenged me Mam. Thanks a lot.
Precious says
So happy to hear that, Rose.
God bless.
Bisola says
I love number two. Be a queen. How can we expect to get a king when you are not prepared to be a queen. A king won't settle for anyone who does not have queenly qualities, confidence, poise and believes in herself.
How to cope when a pastor or leader you look up to disappoints you
Flo says
Christ is our only model to look up to. Leaders and pastors are mortals just like you and me. It's rather unfortunate today that most Christians look up to and believe in their pastors more than God and has been led astray. As for me, Christ is my role model to look up too, because he can never fail us or disappoint us. Look up to Christ dear sister and forgive.
Bisola says
Dear Flo, I stated the same in the post itself. That pastors and leaders and people who we look up to are human and therefore not perfect. It is only God that is perfect.
I also emphasized on the need to forgive and build your faith in Christ.
The day my phone embarrassed me
Precious says
There's truly nothing like a lady who is so confident in herself. Thanks for dropping a line, Bisola!
Flo says
Nice sharing sister. Most often we spend time preparing for wedding, imagining how our wedding dress will look like, but we never take time to prepare for marriage. It is better to be single and hoping to get married than getting into a marriage that will lead to a divorce.To have a good marriage we must be married first to God, before we can have any successful marriage. Trusting God, praying, reading books and articles of how to achieve a happy married life and building your own world is of utmost importance. Good points there and God bless you.
I am happy I have many sisters joining me in this ministry of Marriage.
Precious says
To have a good marriage we must be married first to God, before we can have any successful marriage.
I couldn't have said it better. Thanks Flo!
Damiloves says
Great post again. Truly waiting on God in this area is certainly an active not a passive process. Just as we have to be intentional in worship and service, we cannot waste the waiting period
Damiloves blog
Precious says
I love the way you put it, Dami.
Waiting on God should never be a passive process. It is a time to invest and not waste.
Thanks for those words of wisdom!!
GoodnessMercy says
I love this 'Waiting is not just waiting but living fully while trusting God for the best.'
Thanks ma'am
Precious says
So true, Goodness. God bless you!
CherishExpress says
Say no more! Indeed, there are some ladies with very appalling characters, with even no desire for change. Some of these may be innate but come to think of it, in a world where people will tag the respect of a woman to a man as weak all in the name of fesminism, why wouldn't some women believe that showing anger and strongheadednes equatws to being smart and strongwilled etc?
I always learn something from you whenever I come here. Please, post the link to that our American story for me. I want to continue reading it.
CherishExpress
Joy2Endure says
Beautiful and insightful tips here for all singles. Be a Queen take charge of your life while you wait and let God do the rest. Manna won't fall down from heaven in the form of a husband you have to work hard. It is true some have all these desirable qualities and still search but, keep being the queen.
http://www.joy2endure.com
Precious says
That's true sis. Some have all the desirable qualities but still search. Keep being the queen. Couldn't have said it better.
Mupang Lilian says
Seriously Preshy l lack words to express what am feeling.
Dear God bless you. May he continue to increase you in Jesus name.