Some months ago I narrated the story of how I met Mr N. Here is a sequel to that story. This part is about how I agreed to marry him and how he got introduced to my family. Let's dive in!
In those days my phone was busy. Busy with constant calls from the brother who had first asked me to marry him about three years earlier. We were in two seperate countries but communicated endlessly. I had not said a clear "yes" to him but my love for him had gradually gone pass brotherly love to something deeper than that. I began to envisage a life with him. Maybe we could be a couple. Maybe this could work.
In my "maybe" moment, I had a dream. In the dream, I was set out to marry someone else then suddenly it just didn't work. Then I quickly reverted to agreeing to marry the brother - in the dream.
In real life, I took this as a sign from God that I should go ahead and agree to marry the brother. Afterall, he had the quality I wanted most in a man: a burning passion for God (and he loved me deeply).
So on one of those days, he sent me one of his usual romantic text messages to which I always replied casually. He ended the text with "I love you". I replied "I love you too". That was the moment that changed everything. I had officially agreed to be his.
This was the first thing he typed back:
"Let's pray and commit our relationship into God's hands."
This sealed it for me. I wanted a man who wanted God. I wanted a man who would put God first before anything else.
In the days that followed, we called and texted, called and texted again, then called and texted some more. We discussed our past relationships, our families, our plans and everything in between. We couldn't wait to see each other.
We finally got to meet. I traveled back to Cameroon as I was done with school in Nigeria. The first person in my family who got to know about the brother was my younger brother. I stopped by the town in Cameroon where he was, attending school at the time.
"Papi,"
I said shyly.
"Someone wants to marry me."
My brother looked at me and laughed. I became even shyer. You see, my family had never seen me with a boyfriend. And according to my other brother, Desmond, I was either going to end up a nun or marry a very upright person.
After my awkward announcement to my brother, I zoomed off to the other town where my parents lived. My next dilemma was telling them I was in love with somebody. We never discussed things like that. We spoke about book work and projects. Not falling in love. Not marriage.
I summoned courage and told my mother one morning after she finished praying.
"I want to tell you about the person who wants to marry me."
I said, my speech fast forwarded, my voice shaky and my eyes wandering like that of a confused person.
Like my brother she let out a laugh too. But she proceeded to probe me about him and even prayed about the relationship.
Meanwhile, plans were on the way for the brother to visit me and meet my family.
The morning of his arrival, I wore a sexy pair of jeans and a hot pink blouse and made my way to the bus agency in Nkwen, Bamenda, where he was to arrive. While still in the taxi I saw him.
He had jeans on with a violet-red turtle-neck sweater and a hat which partially shaded his hairy cheeks. Our eyes met and we smiled at each other. It was pure love. My heart was racing.
I alighted from the taxi, walked to him, we hugged each other then took another taxi to my pastor's house, where he was to be staying. While in the taxi, he held my hand and my heart melted. I wanted to stay with him forever.
The pastor and his wife were happy to see him. They were happy to see us together (they knew of the relationship from the moment I said yes to the brother).
The brother had lots of gifts for my family and I. He gave his thoughtful gifts to me which I proudly took home and presented to my mama.
You know what the Bible says? "A man's gift makes way for him..."
My family already liked him before they saw his face. What's not to love about someone who sends you expensive gifts before meeting you?
It was in these days that we had a short-lived courtship. Short-lived because by the next time the brother came, he came for our traditional wedding. I will tell you how our courtship went in another post.
For now, let's talk about you. If you are married how did you say "yes" to your spouse? If you are single, do you freely discuss about dating and relationships with your parents or seniors? Let's talk.
Personally, I am not a sit-at-home person. Mostly on the road so there exists little time to really interact with family members about relationship talks. Moreso, they all know I have not been in any relationship in like 5 years. Now, they are even finding it difficult when I told them am with someone. But I freely speak to my Mum because she won't stop asking about marriage
Trust mothers to bug their kids about marriage. I think it's in their DNA.
Wishing you the best in your present relationship.
Well mine was a case of he just kept saying I'm going to marry you from when he first met me at 17 which I called bluff at the time till when we actually started dating about 5 yrs later.Then I started to feel the same way cos I was much older and wiser.When he gave me a ring it was like it was just physical evidence because deep down I had said yes,maybe in my actions I guess.Stories like this are beautiful to relive.
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Awww..
Hurray for determined men!
Recounting these stories and reliving them is just awesome.
What an enjoyable story. If you see the way I siddon to hear the gist. Lol. This time, you were already in love so no more Shakara for you. You both look so young in that pic.
Yeah! I talk to my mum about guys and prospective guys, why it didn't work out or why I don't like the guy when she invariably comes to question me. Lol. She in turn goes to gist my dad even when I don't send her message. Lol.
I have no senior ones but I talk to my people older than I am,my pastors etc. Their feedback is always great.
And my siblings for sure. My sister will know before my mum sef.
How are you Precious?
Hahahaha trust mothers to tell dads the things we told them in confidence.
I am good, dear. Hope you are too.
Aww..This is such a beautiful story, Love the fact that you agreed in prayer about your relationship, by committing it to God. Yeah I talk to my mum about relationships, possibly a bit to much 🙂
Do hygiene right
Lol at possibly a bit too much. That's good though. There's nothing like being able to talk freely with your mama.
Awww . . . What a sweet story. I love the fact that Mr. N has a burning passion for God. Blessed are you Precious!
I've had many failed and messy relationships. So many that I get scared to talk about it to anyone. I don't have senior siblings. I just talk to God. Sometimes I feel like I'm even getting God tired of mending my heart everytime. I'm praying to move on . . . forget my past love and move forward at the speed of light. It's been rough and tough. But through it all, these things happen for His glory.
Thanks for this sweet story. Looking forward to the next!
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SHARING MY EXPERIENCE - Dating Is Not A Relationship
All those rough relationships only made you stronger, hun.
Gold needs the fire before it becomes gold. And you, my friend are gold.
Hello Precious!
I actually read this post of yours last week and just kept smiling. Haha. Your story is cute like that. Sounds like a beautiful fairytale story and the way you narrated it is so heart warming that makes one go aww. Your marriage will keep reflecting Christ and keep being beautiful as a representative of God's love on earth. God bless you Precious and all that's yours. xx
Amen and amen!
Thanks so much Itunu - now you are making me blush.
Reading this brought back some sweet memories. Hmmm.
I was 18 and just gained admission to a degree awarding institution.
I met my husband on my way to the fellowship one evening, he just finished a course in the school and awaiting his result.
We became friends and started dating after some months.
I left the the school for another school while he also furthered his studies but we still kept in touch.
I introduced him to my family formally when I was through with school, and he was gladly accepted.
We dated for 8yrs and our marriage will b 8yrs this October.
My husband teases me till today that he is the degree I came to collect in that school, since there's no certificate to prove that I attended the institution.
Sorry for the long comment.
Hi sis you two look so cute, i did enjoy your story. But i am still single and at a very confuse stage in my life as many guys have just turn out now, and considering past experiences i am so scared as i don't know which one to choose, for fear of choosing the wrong one. Please big sis help me
Haa lovely. Just smiling. Well I talk to my dad n kid sis, my god mother, mentors n my friend about my relationships. To my mom once in a while.
Girl, I just love ❤️ your easy and simple nature because I truly can't stand the pressure in the society today. Mine was a fairytale. I was a 2nd year student when I first met him and it was and still is a Blessing. I think we talked about marriage almost immediately because he said am looking for a wife not a girlfriend. So we managed to date for 1 year because he was in USA at the time and I was in Cameroon 🇨🇲.We talked everyday, not today that calling is easy with WhatsApp. To cut the story short it happened because it was meant to be. I admire your lifestyle and ways. Thanks for sharing that wonderful Story. My regards to Mr N and the girls. God Bless.
Awww thanks so much, Mispa. May God continue to bless your relationship. Thanks for your kind words, dear.